It’s been awhile.
So this is what it feels like. To write that final goodbye post. I was talking to one of my best blogging friends, and she gave me the perfect word to describe it. Bittersweet.
I remember so much. Some certain scents will take me back. Looking at archives of my blog and watching old agtube videos will bring it all rushing back. And that’s when I know that it’s time. I already wrote this post a few weeks ago. It was too sad and dramatic, even for me.
I guess it fell apart in the usual way. I remember that I was dressing them up, and it didn’t feel the same. No matter what I put them in, I didn’t like it. It hit me right then. I lost my spark. I tried to light it up again. But it didn’t work, and I want to apologize before I go on.
I was unloading the dishwasher in my kitchen, the morning sunlight against my face, and I was reminiscing. My mother brought up the dolls. “What a creative way to spend your girlhood,” and I replied, “It was, wasn’t it?” Because it was so. perfectly. wonderous. The day after, I was cleaning out the doll stuff, and I realized I needed to talk to my mom. I had already told my three absolute amazing blogging friends. After some tears and a long heart to heart, I realized something. I felt so guilty because I felt like I was abandoning you all. All 495 of you. I was then reminded that I wasn’t the 11 year old girl who could spend hours playing with her dolls. I’m 13 now, and I’ve grown. It struck me that if you really cared about me, you would understand that people change and that passions change.
I’m sorry for leaving you, but it’s not fair to myself at this point in time.
You are the reason so much has happened. I gained three of the best friends I’ve ever had, my writing has improved, I have another blog now, I have people who share my interests and people I feel that I belong with, and now I have a passion for photography and I’m just so grateful for all of it.
The Sweet part?
I would never leave you completely! I still have my other blog that I get to focus on to make something so amazing! If you want to keep interacting with me, I’d love for you to go follow and I’ll be sure to work extra hard to keep up with the comments. ❤ https://redheadwithabook.wordpress.com/
I will always remember the past three years. When I hear the words “American Girl” my heart will flutter a little. I will remember what this blog and what the dolls have given me. I will always cherish them in my heart.
I want to take this blog, remember everything it’s given me in my heart, and then move onto my new passions and work on the things that I really love. I love dolls forever, but sometimes you have to say goodbye to things you love. I know it’s the right decision. Who knows, maybe one day I’ll feel like bringing out my dolls again, and taking a few pictures of them. But for now, I’m packaging some of them, and all the clothes my grandma made me in pretty tissue paper. They will be sitting in storage, and I’ll hopefully pass them on to my future daughters one day.
This seems kind of heartless, but it’s simply unrealistic to keep all of the American Girl things that I’ve collected over the years. So instead of keeping all of my dolls, I made the choice to let some of them go.
I will always keep the memories I had with them with me, no chance that I’ll ever sell those. ❤
I am going to be selling a lot of doll things on ebay because there’s no way I can store all of it. I’d really, really appreciate it if you checked it out or reblogged this or posted about it on your blog or even bid on it if you have enough money XD
This is my goodbye. It’s been the most amazing few years I could ever imagine, and I have to say, what an amazing way to spend my girlhood. ❤ ❤ ❤